The year in moving pictures…

Every December-January becomes list time. Robert Dan and I have been listing each other for a few years now.
2004 did not blow me away by any means. I searched the interweb high and low for top ten lists, and here are all the movies I had seen that I was willing to put on the list.

Collateral. Eternal Sunshine. Sideways. Maria Full off Grace. Spiderman Deuce. Farenheit 911. Bourne Supremacy. Hero. House of Flying Daggers. Team America. I Heart Huckabees. Mean Girls. Ocean’s Twelve. Napoleon Dynamite. Dodge ball. Kill Bill 2. Ghost in the Shell 2: Innocence. The Aviator. Meet the Fockers.

So my rating goes as follows:

1. Eternal Sunshine and Sideways tie.
3. Hero.
4. Napoleon Dynamite.
5. Spiderman 2.
6. Kill Bill 2.
7. Collateral
8. Huckabees.
9. Ocean’s Twelve
10. Farenheit 9/11
11. Mean Girls Dodgeball tie.

This was a terrifically hard year to rate. I haven’t seen some of the late heavy hitters, either, like Kinsey, Life Aquatic, Neverland, Hotel Rwanda. Nor old talked up docs like Control Room and Supersize Me.

Eternal was a visual masterpiece, an imaginative tour de force. Well thought out and well carried out. Mark Ruffalo almost stealing the movie, Winslet delivering like usual. The genius David Cross cameo. Awesome.

Sideways surprised me after a shitty preview. I saw it in a sneak pre release, before the hype, and then I helped create the hype. Subtly acted, written, shot. One of the best resolution closure scenes with the wallet and the streaking run. Paynes obsession with the America that America forgot, the people passed over, unremarkable, and yet storied, full of drama and feeling as well, the everyman in all of us… a milestone.

I liked Hero more than most. The color coordination, the curt Chinese dialogue “how swift his sword must be,” “you have underestimated someone.”

Napoleon surrounded you in the quirkiest most realistically unreal societal strata one has ever seen. Unique and charming, intelligent with great follow through.

Spiderman 2 gave you exactly what you paid for, a well rounded popcorn extravaganza. Comedic, pulling at heart strings at time, with enough “damn” moments to keep you in there, and a good set up to the sequal. Need more dunst wet t shirt contests, though.

Kill Bill kept up the pace, though a bit gratuotus in the end with the father figure seen. Filled with more of that crisp idiosyncratic tarantino dialogue of old, and cool original action scenes, it lived up. The complete switch of film aesthetic in the training scene to the 70s hong king martial arts films a stroke of genius. Good times.

Collateral had me piqued for the whole time. Smart, good jittery direction, switching to dv in bits. Foxx’s metamorphosis was believable, Cruises played himself well as that lethal fox, and the Javier Bardem cameo ruled. The mom scene, priceless, and the club scenes is some of the best action of the year.

Huckabees was meant for so few people, im glad im one of them. Kooky, but funny, and in its own way deep, it meandered through lovably laughable characters that entertained. Me.

Hey, shoot me, I love Ocean and his charming friends. It’s a rollercoaster, you don’t have to think too much, just get on for a ride. Eleven, and a good surprise, twelve as well.

People don’t like M. Moore’s down your throat style, nor his tricks of editing (bushes shaking hands with unnamed arabs), but the movie made me think and gave me some shots of the real iraq in war, and it was worth it just for seeing the congressman and senators react to having there children in the war.

It was a hard call between Dodgeball, Ghost, and Mean Girls, but I put the Girls up in the end for all around intelligence in a teen movie. We wad not seen that since clueless, and it was good to know that the genre had some hope to survive the terrible 90s. Dodgeball delivered consistent laughs, and I could watch ben stiller be the jack ass anyday. Vaughn with his mouth was good, (not as good as old school) but really Lumbergh and Bateman as commentators on the ocho stole the movie.

Team America gets props for best puppet sex and musical satires.

Maria i liked alot, but when ranking came, i kinda passed it over. It feels a little bit like a sleeper.

I have spoken. Now have Roberts picks.

Sideways
Eternal Sunshine
Oldboy
Spiderman 2
Mean Girls
The Incredibles
Kill Bill vol 2
Maria Full of Grace

After and before the loss…

Early morning Sunday Stickney took me out for my birthday (he owed it to me). So I went all out and got a steak for breakfast. It was great. Thanks stick!

Poker ended kind of early, so Al and I went to the movies. She had already seen Life Aquatic so we chanced upon The Aviator as movie we could both see over Motorcycle diaries. I now realize that we missed Kinsey, which I think I would have rather seen, though Aviator was passable.

So, what does this convey to you.

Not much I guess. It was supped to contain a perfect pictoric representation of our not being able to find our theatre (number 9) as it was tucked away when you first walk in next to the concessions stand. But it failed. When we arrived all the stubby machines were down, and the line was out the door. We took the Althea gambit (a last ditch effort when unmoving lines make you try to get passed the ticket ripping porcess with nothing but a credit card (that paid for actual bonafide tickets) and charm). Confident, we elegantly explained our cause to the ripper only to be waved through to customer service no questions asked. The gambit mofified easily and paid out huge when just the second we approach the guy, the computer comes back up and we get our tickets before the sixty peopl in front of us downstairs.

But our luck did not end there, he told us that the 6:30 had been sold out for hours and if there was no room he could put is in the 7:10. We went up, lost and found the theatre, and decided to go to the seven in perfect roomy no one infront of us seats rather thatn the second row.

We had some time kill, so I decided we should try and stage the lostness for the blog. But we failed. But it was fun anyway. And a better story in the end.

Poker times…

Thursday, tourney at Upper West Poker Palace. Saturday, cash game. Sunday, a surprising cash game at Althea’s.

Twelve person tournament. I get there late and they almost didn’t let me in. Finally, after some verbal finagaling, they let me stay but I could only buy in for whatever the lowest stack had, sixteen instead of twenty (eight real dollars instead of 10).

I proceed to muck someone’s hand by mistake, they get a bit pissed, and then later I took him out. Needless to say. I made an enemy without meaning to. But I went into the merge with the lead. I fluctuate allot, but stay in commad until its down to four and then I lose most. I live past fourth, and then there were three, Bomba, Neil, Me.

I grind like a motherfucker. The blinds are getting higher and higher and I got to push all in a bunch to be able to stay. I keep up that pace until I actually have enough of a stack to hurt Bombus when he calls an all in when I have an ace. Later he suckers me in brilliantly with aces in the poclet against my top pair, only to be broken by my trip eights. Then there were two.

Neil and I play kinda tight, folding almost everytime the other guy bets. Then he raises pre flop and I go all in with K 10 suited, he has A 7 unsuited. No one catches anything and he wins it. But I got 17 dollars (to his hundred) for a total profit of 9 dollars. Not much monetarily, but a great boost to my ego just by making it as far as I did against such bad odds.

(neil has never smiled like that in his life).

Saturday, cash game action. Kinda small, only six. I go down twenty early. Then I fluctuate, but keeping cool and not calling as aggressively as I usually do I get a good second place to john. I get big slick when he pre flop raises a nice amount, and go all in. He takes a while but calls and I double up. I take twenty more dollars soon after that. Cassens cashes with fifty, leaving for some early preparty.

John takes out his little brother and their friend for 40, I go out the big winner with a hundred profit.

Sunday, novice acting matt returns for the other group cash game. I start the first hand with pocket aces. Matt breaks them with two pair after I slowplay, karma from my Bomba ace breaker closing the circle. The night would continue in this manner. Matt ended biggest winner with 40 profit

John and orson split up about thity profit each.

I cash out 5 for a thirty five loss.

I think I will start logging my poker spendings from now on to keep a tab on how I do. I think I’m pretty even in my past but I have not way to be accurate, so I start fresh today. Since this weekend, I am plus 73.

Who’s who who’s on…

Check it. This is the report I get everyweek.

It all seems normal. The majority fall in the nyc area. Then a few in the California time zone, some in the Midwest mexico city time (probably my kid sister at home). Then we got some Europe time. My guess is one rehanna c. is to blame for those. But look close at the Australia east asia time. Who the hell is that? If you have any information, I would love to put a name to the zone.

And then I could also get domain percentage.

This is not as interesting except for the navy.mil that still intrigues me. Again, 411 on this would be a boon.

So now you see what I can see…

A night to remember xtina…

Xtina is leaving us, back to Idaho, where no one will tell you that you da ho. Because it’s not over done. It never is.

Since I survived a bad rollercoaster at work, I decided I needed a change. I went from canny intellectual

To young boy on the verge of a nervous fixup (breakdown? Get it? Okay, not that funny).

So the party. Mickey’s Blue Room, very xtina. Everyone was there.

Greg can’t keep his hands off me.

Charlotte has a cool ass shemale purse.

Lauren has vanilla cigarettes in a classy pack.

Who knows what is special about this picture?

We went to see Woody fu spin at some sweat spa dance basement, this is one good cab shot,

and we found the zaki pat surprise.

Really, look at that picture. Pat, me, xtina, Barlow, how much ego can a camera withstand? Most people shudder at that sight.

X, you shall be missed. To paraphrase myself: “A big white ball of hopes and dreams that like everything else meandered away from my life.”

Really...

Welcome. Welcome All!

Looking for a cheap and easy...

...way to post, i started poking around in my old writing file. I found this, with very little recollection of every writing it under the title of Ramblings. I know, scapegoat post. so sue me.

Does the degradation of the mind truly affect the decisions that history made for us by decoding the past into newsbytes that don’t digest well or are we all just blinded by those words which mean things, meanings stuffed with implications we will not comprehend until they own us already? Too late for you. They cast your lot.
“What?”
“Jesse. She said she can’t handle me anymore.”
“Did she say why?”

She looked around nervously at the interrogator. So many things came to mind, and yet all seemed unexplainable. The big issues festered around smaller matters that really shouldn’t matter but do. Small things amplified themselves in a coalesced olio that together, as a whole, brought all down. The big picture suddenly coming into focus, crisp, new, complete, not to be argued. The end. No more. Feelings felt stretched as words. Language inadequate. Expression abridged. Looks and tone saying more than meanings.

“No, she said she couldn’t explain it.”
“But it’s over.”
“Yes. Over. Done. Not still going.”
“And this time for real. No more make up break up.”
“No more.”
“Remember the twenty you still owe me.”
“I’ll take the same bet again, if you want.”
“So it’s really over.”
“Yes. Except…”
“What?”
“She could never say what she truly felt.”
“So?”
“Well, towards the end, before I left, she smiled.”
“And?”
“She smiled in a new way. A smile I hadn’t seen. A smile that meant something.”
“But you can’t explain it.”
“No.”

Memories. Blame the memories. Whole entire scenes brought back with skewed camera work, added feelings, fretful thoughts, twenty twenty foresight. No one could express them in entirety. My head is my head and his is his and his shall never be mine and I shall never be his. But saying goodbye, our last as more than one. The gate opens. Memory floods, gushes, takes over. And that kiss, that stupid first kiss that started it all, it remains. It hiders, it hurts, it open and closes. It breathes, a life of its own. It takes over when least expected and hides when most needed. It topples logic and order. And I still love him. Will always have him, etched, scarred—his name in heavenly ink upon my heart, branded. So it must end, and my subconscious has me all to myself again. And I lose that part of me which he once safeguarded.

“How’d he take it?”
“He’s a stoic.”
“That bad?”
“Monosyllabic.”
“Monosyllabic males meagerly manipulate mature mothers.”
They laugh.

And of course I smiled and said yes its for the best. That’s what you do. You suppress the volcano. You shield yourself from your self. Unplugged. Because it hurt. It hurts. The mind tires, it tries to wrap itself around truth and fails. Subjectivity peaks its head. Everything seen through your eyes. And all you can think about is not the starving children in upper Mongolia or the immenent destruciton of the entire world by nationalistic hatred, but the way she held your head and smoothed over your hair when you cried about Pete. The encompassing smile when she first beat you at

“I’m going back to talk to her.”
“Why?”
“I have to.”
“What will that do?”
“Stop talking in question marks.”
“Did you yourself not bet me this would not happen?”
“I can always owe you more money.”
“And you can always live in the past.”
“The future holds nothing for me alone.”
“How deep. It’s not her you really want, just someone.”
“So?”

It’s the right thing to do. You two will not work out. You’ve saved both of you, now each can find truer happiness elsewhere. And you can’t miss him. That will not do. Time to move on. Who knows, maybe a single’s life is really what I have been after all this time. No worries about anything not related to your self.

Well kiddies…

…its time to rap up some long needed posting on my time in mexico and henceforth.

Right before my departure my good friend from college Lauren stopped in town. She came the day before I left, so we could only meet up one night, which sucked, but its always good to fester in the nostalgia of collegiate days with a fellow comrade.

Lo, keep that side of the country running…

Once in mexico, my dog died. Yes, one of the few loves of my life,

Ebony and Ivory had to be put to sleep.

Not a fun day, but I decided to not look upon it in any sort of maudlin light. She lived a beautiful full life in a warm house that had everything she wanted. She brought years of happiness to all around her… She will be missed… But her time was cherished…

Look here’s the second girl I ever kissed…

Paulina Ugarte, at the movies, seeing, if I am not mistaken, Batman Returns.

Then it was xmas. Which means presents. Look, I wrapped them myself.

One for everybody, each with their own shitty little drawings.

And what always follows xmas at the stephens houseold? Why Luis Jo’s birth day, of course. Yes, I was born on Halloween, my older brother was born on xmas, my younger on fri. the thirteenth… how? Why? Who knows. The sister’s came close. Elder with D day.
Very exciting.

Then, I went up to my dad’s studio.

And took pictures of all his work. Some did not come out so well, but I like these two here. My dad with his mom and dad on each shoulder.

And his wife, my step mother Karen.

And here is his hulk soap.

Finally, I came back. On my two planes, I had a baby behind me.

And they cried like little babies, but they were cute. and i was cracked out.

New years, kerry looked like a vixen.

And the party at stew keith micah and paul’s place brought 2005 in wit’ a bang. You can never go wrong with Carlo. Right, Baum?

Paul, stop with the monkey business.

Here is the first picture of 2005, at the very first second of the year (I know I know, it was new years at every hour somewhere in the world).

This is the only picture i will ever take of keith

And finally, I saw these boots in the subway and I had to snap.

Bye. Fuck you all and the horses you slept with to get here.

Oh shit. Things are going to get crazy!